How to Survive a Breakup

 

survive a breakup

How do you survive a breakup when you’re not prepared for it? You’re worried your partner may leave you and you’re afraid your love life is in trouble.

Learn how to survive a breakup by thinking about your relationship a little differently.

If you think your partner may leave you, consider looking inward.  You’re probably wondering how can I be responsible for the way my partner is acting?

Ask yourself. Have you been acting in a loving way? Are you waiting to be loved first? It’s easy enough to test this out. Try acting more loving towards your partner.

Your thoughts are just as powerful as your partner’s. There’s a good possibility if you adjust your behavior you’ll get a better response from your loved one. Try it.

Ask yourself if you still possess the same lovable qualities you had when you met. Have you evolved into someone else? Maybe you’ve lost a sense of who you are. You may not even be in love with yourself right now and your partner is responding to your thoughts. Try adjusting your thoughts and behavior to be more loving to yourself and your partner.

Or perhaps you and your partner no longer have the bond you once did. They may not be the right match for you. Maybe they never were. Is it possible if you’re really honest with yourself you may have evolved to the point where you really don’t have the desire to keep your relationship going either. That’s fine. Let it go.

Because if I’m honest, I remember hanging onto relationships I didn’t really want to be in. I hung on partly because I didn’t want to fail. Deep down I was trying to prove to myself I was desirable and hoping the relationship hadn’t been a huge waste of time. Not the best motivation for staying and not the best recipe for happiness!

Sometimes we meet people we fall in love (or lust) with and then spend a lot of time talking ourselves into the rest of the package. Without true compatibility a relationship can’t stand up to the challenge of the day to day.

If your partner is pulling away, maybe this is supposed to happen.

You can survive a breakup.

Ask yourself if deep down you haven’t been pulling away too. Actions usually upset us because they touch a part in ourselves we don’t like or feel fear about.

Therefore don’t let the fear of the unknown stop you from realizing your partner may not be right for you. If they’re pulling away the answer could be; you’ve become totally unlovable; in which case ask yourself why and adjust your actions and thoughts. OR, your partner is creating the necessary space for both of you to re-assess why you’re both in this relationship.

No one leaves us, unless we left first (in heart) or unless they lack the commitment needed to create a long-term bond. If they’re going to leave, let them go. It’s not worth trying to hang on to someone who doesn’t want to be there, and it can be very damaging to your self respect. Knowing how to survive a breakup is key.

The more you try to hang onto someone who isn’t right for you the less available you are to someone who is. Don’t be afraid of being alone until you find the one who is right for you (or they find you)!

From personal experience I’ve found being alone is essential to spiritual growth. Being on your own is much better than staying with a partner out of fear of the unknown. Don’t be afraid to step away. When you love and accept yourself in all your imperfection, love will always find you. That’s how you handle a breakup.

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Tessa

I hope to inspire smart women over fifty to embrace a positive, confident, resilient life of connection and travel! love | life | travel | positively

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